Skip to main content

Dumb Clients? Clueless Agencies? Pick One...Or Both.

The mind reels and the eyes spin after a 1,000 mile cross-country drive.  Why?

Not for the traffic jams caused by Illinois' mind-numbingly stupid decision to waste "stimulus" dollars repaving an already perfectly-smooth I-55 from St. Louis to Joliet.  You expect idiocy from Illinois politicians.  And the paving contractor is probably some pol's brother-in-law.

No, my allergic reaction stems more from the astounding numbers of bad, really, truly, horribly, miserably, wretched billboards devoted to hospital marketing messages.  C'mon people.  What are you THINKING?

Dumb clients?  Clueless agencies?  One has to wonder.

Copy that rambles on...and on...and on.   Can't ANYBODY get to the POINT in 6 words or less?

Colors that wash out in the sun...and under sodium vapor lights...and at dawn...and dusk.  Isn't someone paying for these things DRIVING THE BOARD once in a while?

Acronyms and buzzwords. Do you REALLY think a billboard is the place to be telling the masses about your smashing new EMR or your performance improvement activities?  Really?  Sorry, at 75 mph, when I see "PI" I think Magnum, not readmission rates.

Confusing names. "The Blah-Blah Institute at South MegaPlex Hospital & Medical Center's North Main Street Pavilion."  All I get is "..Blah-Blah..."  All I care about is...well, I don't care.  I passed caring 10 miles ago.

What's that you say?  Cross-country drivers aren't really your intended audience?  You're going after the locals?  Yeah, maybe, but you're paying for BOTH.  And you're reaching neither.

Next time I'm flying.  Whatever's in American Airlines' seat-back pockets has to be easier on my eyes than what adjoins our interstate highways, though undoubtedly less rant-worthy.  On second thought, who am I kidding?


Comments

Chris Bevolo said…
Great rant, Steve. I linked to your post on my blog so others can share in the pain.

One funny note: when I came back to your blog, I saw this in your GoogleAds:

"Billboard Advertising
Find billboards anywhere in the USA with a no-charge proposal."

Maybe that's what's behind all the crappy outdoor!

: )

Popular posts from this blog

Becoming Consumer Friendly In Five Easy Steps...Or Not

An article at hhnmag.com offers hospitals 5 steps to becoming more consumer friendly.

If you still think there's a secret sauce to your hospital becoming more "consumer friendly," these 5 steps are as good a place to start as any.  Unfortunately, it's a little like that old Steve Martin comedy bit where he says he'll teach you how to be rich. The first step is to go find a million dollars.

Step 1 from the article is realizing that "...a Medicare beneficiary with chronic conditions is different from a young mom who brings her kids in for an annual check-up." This is market segmentation for beginners, and, yes, one size decidedly does not fit all. I'm sure your marketing team's been saying this for a while.

Steps 2-5: have a strategy, metrics, a champion and resources. OK. Hard to argue with any of those.

But those things, alone or together, won't overcome culture. They're important components to be sure, but insufficient without a …

My Take On Anthem-Cigna, Big Dumb Companies and the Executives Who Run Them

After last Friday's Appeals Court decision, Anthem's hostile takeover of, er, merger with Cigna has but a faint pulse. Good. Unplug the respirator. Cigna's figured it out but Anthem is like that late-late horror show where the corpse refuses to die. Meanwhile, 150 McKinsey consultants are on standby for post-merger "integration" support. I guess "no deal, no paycheck..." is powerfully motivating to keep the patient alive a while longer.

In court, Anthem argued that assembling a $54 billion behemoth is a necessary precondition to sparking all manner of wondrous innovations and delivering $2.4 billion in efficiencies. The basic argument appears to be "We need to double in size to grow a brain. And just imagine all those savings translating directly into lower premiums for employers and consumers." 

Stop. Read that paragraph again. Ignore the dubious "lower premiums" argument and focus on the deal's savings.

$2.4 billion saved from a p…

Another Day, Another App, Another Satisfied Customer

How might health care providers use technology to turn customers' mobile phones into information displays and ordering devices? A few years ago, the NY Times outlined how retailers are doing it...
"(Designer Norma) Kamali is at the forefront of a technological transformation coming to many of the nation’s retailers. They are determined to strengthen the link between their physical stores and the Web, and to use technology to make shopping easier for consumers and more lucrative for themselves.
...

Cisco Systems, the supplier of networking equipment and services for the Internet, is also a leader in the field. The company’s Mobile Concierge system is capable of connecting customers’ smartphones to retailers’ wireless networks — so a shopper could type “Cheez Whiz” into a cellphone, then pinpoint its location in the store." Ms. Kamali's boutique installed a technology called ScanLife, "allowing people to scan bar codes on merchandise and obtain details about the…